Thursday

F U CUPID

I'm a procrastinator, a night owl, a single lady, and I work from home. This winning combo means I spend most evenings at my desk, making it difficult to meet anyone. And no matter how much I tip the delivery man he refuses to make a move. Yesterday I "made it rain" on the San Loco guy. He silently handed me my tacos and started picking up the dollar bills. "I'm sorry," I whispered as I closed the door.

So last night I decided to try my hand at on-line dating. Instead of telling friends I couldn't hang out with them I'd try saying that to men I didn't know. The messages quickly started flooding in despite the fact that I only posted one photo:


The only problem was that every guy that messaged me had a real sparse comb over. I'm not picky, ask anyone besides my exs, but this type of hair-do is a deal breaker for me. So I went back and revised "what I was looking for" to add that I didn't want anyone that was balding. 

That prompted the following response:


Had I known it'd be this easy to find my soulmate I would have logged on years ago.

8 comments:

  1. Bawahhhhhahaha! I just spit out my coffee reading this. You are too funny, but that guy should probably get a new hair do. What a jerk.
    I know the feelings of working late and not having the chance to meet someone. But one day u will and with that bod very soon! Don't give up or give in.

    xxoo
    Nicole

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  2. Yer photoshop skills are pretty good...Do guys still do the comb over? I haven't seen one since my father in law died.

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  3. Hmm...sounds like he is just as superficial. I doubt he would have messaged you if you didn't have a 'pretty face'. Haters are gonna hate. Love will find you soon enough ;)

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  4. how'd you get your head up in here? and how dare you insinuate that image was photoshopped!

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  5. You would have been even more successful if you met up with me last night!

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  6. you are a fucking genius. and you speak for 90 percent of women when you say "combover, not desirable". eek they make my skin crawl. you crack me up, you have some major photoshop skills, and i will be following you forever if you keep these shenanigans up. oh yea, thank you for following me too :)
    http://www.indieelectronicalternative.com/

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  7. can i touch your boobs?

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  8. Everyone knows that OK Cupid is where you go to be slutty. This man should be on EHarmony if he wants people to be less shallow.

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